Better

Today i made a walk into town, just like i said i would yesterday. I didn’t sleep too well, but i did woke up a bit later, around a quarter to eight. Slowly getting into winter time.

I did start thinking better thoughts once i was outside. The sun was shining. Halfway i thought i walk past the new Boymans building, which will open Friday. I will go inside once it is open, i’m sure. Curious to see it in full display.

It does take me more energy to keep myself on track. I don’t always get there. Maybe it is because i need to sort out myself. Yes, i think that is my main problem. I know i was always a bright child. In school i really enjoyed myself, from the lower school to art school. But even at the technical university i enjoyed myself. After that was when the hard part started. Working for the first five years was good. But i got slowly worse. Till i stopped. I didn’t want to do it anymore. I wanted to find my own way of living in this world. I still do. I still do!

I am not giving up. No way.