Yesterday i walked back from the supermarket to home. Some talking to friends, standing in the door opening of a house, asked me a question. I don’t even remember what he said. I replied something, along the line that it made no sense what he was saying. It was a quick reply. At the same time i wondred why he asked me that. I wasn’t part of the conversation, i was simply walking by. While i was walking away they started laughing. I looked back. It hurt me a bit. I felt like they were sharing some secret. Back home i thought about what i was asked. Then i thought sex. Of course.
I cried while i saw this video. It spoke to me while i was watching it for the first time. I do feel rejected. I am still looking for something worthwhile to say. Something which will resonate. I hope i can find it.
The second time i cried today was while reading this book Ultimate Questions. I went back and tried to find the piece which caused these emotions with me, but couldn’t find it. So i photographed another part. It is about being alone, communicate with others, feeling desperate when you do not communicate with anybody. Mostly.