This morning i woke up around four. The cat was miaowing outside and scratching the door. I do close it the last weeks because litle Mieke does like to wake me up in the middle of the night with her little paw with those sharp nails. After a while i do go out, walk to the kitchen, stroke her and let her eat some dry cat food. This morning i got out too. And walked to the kitchen.
I went back to bed and put on the light and got my iPad and read a little. Then i got my book and read some more. Modesitt‘s Recluce series now, the books i have. Then i tried to fall back to sleep a bit more. I often fail! At nights i think. Sort of dream awake. No dream is ever the same as another. It is usually the same situation, but each time with a different scenario. Slightly different.
The last couple of days i do fall asleep again in the morning. This morning i had two dreams. Which i remember! This is new, because usually i don’t remember my dreams anymore. But today i did. I made drawings of them. Not terribly successful, but they are still images connected to those dreams. They were not pleasant dreams.
I don’t know what these dreams mean. But i do see i’m scared in both of them. The last one reminds me of a dream i had much earlier, when i was around 20 years old.
I’m in a building in the Shell swimming pool area close to my parent’s house. There are people lying on a sloping curve, their faces visible. There is a gel like substance flowing over them. Only the people at the top survive. They stand up and walk down over the dead people. It is really frightening me. A nightmare.
Another dream i remember is one i had the night i read The Neverending Story by Michael Ende. The book is so much better than the film. The dream is around 35 years old.
I’m running down a street. I do see the street building up as in run from a grey background. I keep on running into the greyness, but i never fall into it. I do remember walking into a house at one time, but that’s very vague.
The last days i’ve been very tired. I do think a lot too. Nothing fancy pancy, nothing dreamlike. I think i’m on the brink of making a decision. Soon.