This hexagram, like sun, is one of the eight formed by doubling of a trigram.
The trigram Tui denotes the youngest daughter; it is symbolized by the
smiling lake, and its attribute is joyousness. Contrary to appearances, it is not
the yielding quality of the top line that accounts for joy here. The attribute of
the yielding or dark principle is not joy but melancholy. However, joy is
indicated by the fact that there are two strong lines within, expressing
themselves through the medium of gentleness.
True joy, therefore, rests on firmness and strength within, manifesting itself
outwardly as yielding and gentle.
THE JUDGMENT
THE JOYOUS. Success.
Perseverance is favorable.
The joyous mood is infectious and therefore brings success. But joy must be
based on steadfastness if it is not to degenerate into uncontrolled mirth.
Truth and strength must dwell in the heart, while gentleness reveals itself in
social intercourse. In this way one assumes the right attitude toward God and
man and achieves something. Under certain conditions, intimidation
without gentleness may achieve something momentarily, but not for all
time. When, on the other hand, the hearts of men are won by friendliness,
they are led to take all hardships upon themselves willingly, and if need be
will not shun death itself, so great is the power of joy over men.
THE IMAGE
Lakes resting one on the other:
The image of THE JOYOUS.
Thus the superior man joins with his friends
For discussion and practice.
A lake evaporates upward and thus gradually dries up; but when two lakes
are joined they do not dry up so readily, for one replenishes the other. It is
the same in the field of knowledge. Knowledge should be a refreshing and
vitalizing force. It becomes so only through stimulating intercourse with
congenial friends with whom one holds discussion and practices application
of the truths of life. In this way learning becomes many-sided and takes on a
cheerful lightness, whereas there is always something ponderous and one-
sided about the learning of the self-taught.
My earliest memory is the one where i am around a year and a half old. It is warm. My hands are on stones. Warm stones. In front of me is my mother. She points to something behind me. I look around. It is my dad, with a thing in front of his head. He uses his finger on it.
This memory came back to me in a dream, when i was around twenty years old. I found the photo. It was strange. I remember the feeling of the warm stones under my hands so well. My father taking a picture of me and my mom. I felt happy. And i was looking at this photo and seeing myself and remembering the feelings i had when i was so little.
I did loose the photo. I looked for it several times over the years, but nothing. Still, the memory is ingrained in me.
It is a very structured situation. Me, my mother and my father. My mother pointing at my father. My father hiding his face. Not being present. Looking through the lens. Clicking.
Taking care of the cats of friends, in 1985, while they were on holiday in Turkey. In the centre of Rotterdam. A side street of the West Kruiskade. He had just bought Cupid & Psyche 85, the album of Scritti Politti. I was hooked. Later on i reread my old Vinyl magazine collection. There were two interviews in it. One in 1982, the other in 1984. I must have read them. Why didn’t i buy Songs to Remember? I don’t know.
The three or four weeks i stayed in that house, i was playing Cupid & Psyche almost continuously. The music, the lyrics, i was in love. When my friends came back, i apologized to him, saying i played it so much, i was sure there ticks on the album. He didn’t mind. I bought the album for myself. Yay! I also bought a 12″ from The Word Girl. Loved it too.
Only later i bought Songs to Remember, in February 1986.
It was on a Tuesday. I went to Haddock, a record store in the center. There it was. I remember buying it. When i got home i put it on. I remember hearing the sounds of The “Sweetest Girl” for the first time. I don’t know why, but at that moment i threw coins for the I Ching. Well, i did throw them a lot in those days. I got the thirteenth sign Fellowship with Men with a changing nine on the fifth place.
Life leads the thoughtful man on a path of many windings.
Now the course is checked, now it runs straight again.
Here winged thoughts may pour freely forth in words,
There the heavy burden of knowledge must be shut away in silence.
But when two people are at one in the inmost hearts,
They shatter even the strength of iron or of bronze.
And when two people understand each other in their inmost hearts,
Their words are sweet and strong, like the fragrance of orchids.
I still don’t know exactly what this means.
I do know this has got to do with me. With how i lead my life. With what i am working for.
I had written my very first published html page. A week after, a good friend came by and i showed it to her. She asked me, why had i stopped? Why hadn’t i continued working?
I felt so silly.
The day after i published my next page.
The early days of then home.luna.nl/~ellen were great. The things i made then were a mixed bag. I stopped working on those pages in December 1997. The next year i worked on homebase. I collected images, old works, new works and munched it all together. A maze.
I was asked to participate in a exhibition de Kunstvlaai in the Westergasfabriek in Amsterdam. I prepared some bits. When i was there, i knew i had to change it. So i decided to make a page which would change the whole time. A free day. 14 May 1999. My first present.
This electrified me. This felt great. I don’t even know if people were really watching. Just working on this the entire day, making all these shots, doing my own make up, doing my own hair, it felt huge! I loved loved loved it.
1999 stood out. Flash was a great discovery. I worked almost every day.
2005 stood out. I remember the end of 2004, something happened to me then. I started going to the gym in January 2005, lost around 10 kilos. I felt good.
But it was a last sprint.
From 2006 until 2014 i hardly ever worked on lfs.nl. I worked in real life. In 2011 i started working for myself as an independant front-end developer.
Looking back on that time, i realize now it was a hard time. There was only work and gaming. And television. I hardly saw my old friends. I had stopped trying to make that all work. I saw my life falling apart and nothing much was left over. It seemed.
This year, 2016, i went to London for a Scritti gig in the Roundhouse. I went there with a purpose, to give my drawings to Green Gartside. I had talked about it here, on this site. I remember talking about doing this ten years ago with friends. They advised me not to do this, that it would be awkward. I think they were right.
But this year it felt like the right thing to do. So i did it. After a long wait, having some doubts, having more drinks, i did give them.
It was different from what i had imagined. But it was real. I will not forget.
I hope Green likes them. I haven’t heard anything since, but that is ok. I’m still working here. Enjoying myself. Leading my own life, as i should.
The past two years of my life are extremely important to me. The way i fell in love, the way it disappeared. That i suddenly got back working on lfs.nl. A miracle. No difficult things i needed to do. Simply add a new present.
The time i realized that i was about to make my last present, in January 2015. About.
The time i started working on this website, ellenpronk.com. I haven’t missed a day yet. Apart from a week off between Christmas and New Year. I actually have given myself five weeks off. Like a proper job.
I know this place is not visited that much, but i do hope visitors will appreciate what they get here.
On this website i write about my past, about the current day, the food i eat, the stuff i think about, the garden, the work i have done, the songs i sing, the video’s i have made.
I love this place.
Working here means everything to me. I can still feel new future uses. I do see certain categories slowing down, others coming into existence. I love how it flows.
I love this place.
I will keep on working on it. Until it is time to stop. Not anytime soon!
I remember a dream from last night. This is rare. I don’t remember them at all the past ten? twenty? years.
I was staying in a hotel. I went to the canteen to get something to eat. It was a proper canteen, with sweets stacked up at the sales person. I was standing there and i realized i had forgotten to get a tray. I looked back and saw a line of people standing behind me. I also saw a tray in front of me, but with stuff stacked upon it. I did get it and moved the stuff of. To the dismay of the sales person.
Today will be a slow day. I know i should do some cleaning in my house. It has been on my mind for the past week or two. So i hope i will finally do a bit today.
I did clean my bathroom! Yay!
I went out to do a bit of shopping. But i went to the Stairs at the Central Station first. Went all the way up! I did stand still twice. It is quite a climb. On top i went all around again. I didn’t film anything at the top, but i did film going up and going down. I might do something just with those films, the stairs.
When i got back home i made my last coffee. Tea from now on. No cream and no sugar in there. I watched Escape to the country on the BBC. Then i sat behind my computer and checked my mail, twitter and facebook. And hey! Carolien has made an comment on my last post:
Thank you Ellen, for this. For inviting me and Jeroen in your dancing. The two of us don’t dance often enough anyway. The courage to create your life daily. I like it. Lieve groet, Carolien
Thank you Carolien! I do hope one day we will have a dance evening for real.
Evening.
I watched half Back to the Future. I’ve seen it like ten times, or more. Still like it.
I did just turn it of. Don’t feel like watching the whole movie.
Outside it’s raining. Lightning too. No thunder though. Not yet anyway. The sound of water running down you can hear clearly.
Earlier i did import the movies i made today in iMovie. I think i will make a movie will just the stairs bit. Something with a rhythm? Hopefully it will be done by the end of this week. I do have enough footage now.
Going to bed now. Read a bit, watch some youtube clips. Gardening tips!
It is Sunday morning. A bit warm. A bit cloudy. But still, the balcony door is open, the cats dozing of. A lovely morning.
I have chickpeas cooking. Beetroot in the oven. I’ll be making hummus with it in a few hours. A bit of tahin left over, but not enough. I’ll be putting some sunflower seeds in there too.
I just looked up a recipe for the sunflower seeds. I do need to roast them for around 5 – 10 minutes. They do need to be cool before you move on.
OK, done that.
I only need to add olive oil and blend them until smooth.
I did just taste a chickpea. It is ok, but could do with a bit more cooking, for around half an hour or so.
Well, i hadn’t planned on writing about the hummus i’m about to make! I did set the category of this post to food too. I might even make a few pictures.
What i had planned was writing about not falling in love. Which is what i have planned for myself for the moment. I’m not sure though.
I came across this quote from Maya Angelou at Brain Pickings:
We need the courage to create ourselves daily, to be bodacious enough to create ourselves daily — as Christians, as Jews, as Muslims, as thinking, caring, laughing, loving human beings. I think that the courage to confront evil and turn it by dint of will into something applicable to the development of our evolution, individually and collectively, is exciting, honorable.
The courage to create yourself daily. That does speak to me. I do realize that posting this on this blog makes it open for others to see. That is my own choice. It forces me to keep on working on it. And i don’t mind. Well, not too much! Sometimes i’m embarrassed. Ouch.
It is difficult. I treasure the time at home. To listen to music. To watch tv. To read. Not as much as i would like, but still! To watch youtube. To read the whole internet! To cuddle my cats. To cook.
I have to reread what i wrote in my last post Work. I do try to keep things simple. But pfff, that takes much.
It’s evening now. I didn’t do a lot of work in the garden. Nicole from the States came by and we talked for a long time about the garden, about why we work there, what we buy in a supermarket and other things. I showed her around. It was raining the whole time, but not cold, so i didn’t really mind that much. Once i was wet anyway.
I watched a bit of television. Grand Designs, De grote verbouwing, i love to watch. I had already seen the episode, but i still watched it.
Then i danced.
That was quite a few weeks, since i last danced. Took some time to get into it. I always dance with other people in my mind. People from the garden popped up. Marijn was there too, Liorah, Jeroen, Carolien. I was inviting them to come to dance with me. It was good.
And then the thought hit me. I should fill up my life. I should be as happy as i can be. Time alone is part of that, of course. But i also love to be with other people. Simply talk with them. Enjoy life.
I do not know everything. I have so many things to learn.
But i do realize that the past year and a half i’ve been happy, all by myself. In a very quiet way. Other people will have hardly noticed it. i’m sure. But yes, the Turkish man selling big potatoes and kebab on the market has noticed it. People eating chips at the side of the library have noticed it.
So yes, fill up my life with the things i want to do. Be as happy as i possibly can.
😀
Ooh, the title of this post. Yes, not fall in love. If i can. 😉
I don’t mind. I’ve been alone a large part of my life.
Solitude. It can be difficult to keep yourself together in solitude. To trust yourself. Not other people outside of your own world, who keep on saying the same thing over and over again. Be sensible. Be smart.
I do know i am not the one to choose my life. It is chosen for me, by the world outside me, by the people all around. By what they do, by what they do not do.
A life alone or a life in the midst of the world.
I am not the one to pick either. I can only lead my life, the way i see is best.
Half my life is a dream life. The past year and a half, these dreams i did not have sleeping, i had them awake. Sometimes during the day, other times during the night.
Night dreams are usually stronger, more vivid. Less distraction. I spend some times crying in my bed. Not out of unhappiness. From pure emotion, sadness, happiness, hopelessness all mixed together.
All these dreams happened when i was in my house or in the train. Immovable. In the train listening to music, my mind following its own pace.
When i’m outside of my house, shopping or walking, or both, i don’t dream. I look around, at the people, at the trees, the birds and dogs.
I’m still at home a lot, by myself. I work at ellenpronk.com, sometimes i have some paid work, sometimes i play a game, sometimes i watch tv. And the rest of the time i dream. Daydream. Nightdream.
These dreams are all connected. They move forward slowly. My current dreams are so different from a year ago.
I am observing my dreams. Letting them happen is one thing. Thinking about them is another. That is hard. The dreams are my ultimate fantasy, my ultimate life, the things i wish for most.
I dream i am invited in a television show. The last week i see other shows, but i usually pick De wereld draait door. The past day i had a dream i started to sing. Do Re Mi. From the Sound of Music. I did sing My favorite things a few months ago.
I am directing the sentences to people in the audience. A line for the table man or lady. A line for Matthijs. A line for Pauline Cornelisse. A line for Hadewych Minis. Applause. Huge!
Well. Let’s start with saying that the things i dream about are most likely not to happen. Not entirely, not literally. But yes, i confess, i am curious about getting on television, getting asked questions. It is dangerous. I might close up. These dreams to me are exercises. What if something like this would happen, how would i react?
I am still living quietly. Still waiting. But i also do know that a change can happen suddenly.
Falling in love is my ultimate dream. I used to fall in love a lot more when i was younger. Hopelessly. Dreams full of romantic images. A body full of feelings. It took me a long time to get a bit of control over these feelings. I would have given up everything if someone would have fallen in love with me. Sadly nobody did. Ooh, that is not true, i do think some did, but they were so shy and polite, they never said anything to me and looked me in the eyes. I only got a card from someone from art school. I didn’t know how to handle that. So i said nothing. I also remember getting a letter from someone while i was studying in Delft, but that story never left the paper.
A year and a half ago i had this crush on someone i met at work. I do remember seeing his wedding ring. At that moment i felt the romantic feeling leaving me. A breath of fresh air. That felt good.
The feelings were still there though. So i had to find someone way outside of my world. Someone i would never meet. Someone living in another world. I don’t know how i made that switch. But i remember standing in the train, while i was still working and thinking about him. So stupid. But also very tempting.
Over the past year and a half there were moments i could leave this feeling of love. I had conversations with myself, in which i was very stern with myself. Stupid girl! Do not do this. It is a dream, it is not real. But deep in the dark of night, where my daytime mind leaves me and the night enters, i dream away.
I should apologize really. Not that it had any effect on this person, since he doesn’t know. It is just my own private little heaven on this planet. A place i know i should leave. If i want to make something of my life. If i want to start talking, be in this world. If i want to dance, sing, talk, sleep, walk, smile, laugh, be quiet, be happy. I would like my life to be too busy to dream away.
So yeah, this person, David Gamson, i might meet someday. Or not. I probably will turn red. Or not. I don’t know. I hope by that time i will be busier than i am now. I do hope my life will get busier. Soon.
My school reports. From the age of six, at the lower school, till the age of 27 at the end of art school. High school i did enjoy loads. Yep. I really enjoyed mathematics, physics and chemistry. Once i could drop French and German i did so. I really didn’t like learning things which had no logic in them. To me anyway.
The first report from high school, in class B5, is my secret pride and joy: only the grades eight and nine. Other than that, i detested that year. I was happy to move into the second year A with Latin. Much better.
My grades did fall down over the years. The switch from Delft Technical University to art school was one of finally giving in. A month before i had my exams from high school i was free, to study for my exams. That is the time i started to draw again. And make earrings. While studying in Delft i did keep up with drawing. Friends of mine did go to art school, and in Rotterdam i got to know more people who were going there as well. So it did start to pull me more and more.
The first year at art school was wonderful. One of the best years of my life. It did get worse after that. Of course. Choosing painting was not good, and i couldn’t continue with it. Cuz of the O’s i got at the end of the year. Picking photography and monumental was better, and i did end up somewhere. Not sure where, but i did find something i was interested in.
In 1997 i started again, with my website. Studying, playing, experimenting, finding things, trying out. I loved it.
The eight years after 2006 were empty of works. I didn’t stop thinking about it for a long time. It did grow less and less. In the first part of 2014 i didn’t feel good, i hardly worked. I was a mess. And then, suddenly, in October 2014, i started again. No things i had to fix, no pages i needed to work out. I simply started again. And i kept on going. Until i could finally finish my presents with an about page. And two weeks after that i started blogging here on ellenpronk.com.
I know i’m a bit silly working on this website so hard. I probably should work for money more. Try to get work somehow. But, somehow, i feel things will work out.
Enjoy these old school reports. No translation, sorry non-Dutch reading people. You can read the figure’s and letter i got. I do hope you enjoy reading this!
Last night i was lying awake, around four. I wanted to sleep, but it just didn’t happen. At one point i turned on the lights and got my iPad and played a game. And turned the iPad away again. In the dark, i was thinking of writing a post about falling in love. Which of course i have written before. Sex. Love. Daydreaming. Art.
Falling in love. It is still my biggest dream. Apart from becoming famous. *grin*
I do feel different. Different from when i was younger. Growing up, feeling all these emotions. I always felt too awkward, too closed up inside myself to really get someone’s attention. Looking back, i see my fallings in love were from a very young person. I remember my last one, which i could quite easily hold back once i realized he was married. The first time i was able to do that. Luckily.
So yes, i do know i have grown over the past ten years. I like myself better now. More open, more curious about other people. Not that the biggest part of me is still very private, not that i really enjoy being with myself.
Today i was at the Vredestuin. Some seeding, courgettes. Some planting, onions. Some harvesting, spinach. Some talking to the other people working in the garden. I loved it.
I’m gonna leave this post as it is. I am tired. An early night for me.
PS. I don’t know if i was right in saying here i felt awkward when i was younger. I might have been too closed up inside. But it seems to me i was quite happy on my own. I was never bothered with it. I remember the summer of 1986, just before i went to art school. And the summer of 87. I don’t think i saw one single person.
There is also the switch in going out. When i lived in Vlaardingen and had a group of friends, we did go out, in Rotterdam most of the time. But when i moved to Rotterdam, i had lost contact with that group, and i simply didn’t go out anymore.
It is hard to write an introduction for pages which do not exist yet. Usually these pages of a book are written last, when the contents of the book are known. It is the place where the reader is given an clue of what to expect, the place where acknowledgements are made. Only rarely do i read those pages thoroughly myself. I skip to the contents, the index and the bibliography. You might wanna do the same thing, so i can indulge myself here a little further.
It is hard to write an introduction to pages which do not yet exist. I did set out some guidelines for myself though. I will try to think of these pages as a public diary, a sketchbook. This will give me some freedom, not everything i do needs to be ‘perfect’ and ‘planned’. Ofcourse this is only to help myself, i am a terrible control freak, often prone to a paralysing doubt about what i do and its value. I actually thought i had given up my work for good; i had found a nice job where i feel happy enough, but quite suddenly i felt the need to rethink my old work, which i made when i was at artschool (’86-’91). The idea of combining my old work and the internet breathed new life in it. For a couple of months i was thinking about this new work. The main reason i would like this to be a sketchbook is that i realise i have to start making things. Its been quite some time since i’ve really worked and i know i have to go through the first disasters before i can come up with some quality – i hope. The internet is a nice fluid medium, where pages can appear and disappear in no time.
I am not sure how these pages will develop, i don’t know how frequent the updates will be. It might be less than i anticipate at this moment. Maybe, when you read this somewhere in the future, you will know more than i do now. Maybe than, where there is nothing now, there will be something for you to discover.
This text was published on 1 July 1997 on www.luna.nl/~ellen. In 1999 i moved my website to lfs.nl.
Looking back on my time spend working on lfs.nl, calling it a sketchbook was a good thing. Liberating. I could take breaks, days or weeks long. I could do anything i wanted.
I remember thinking that i would end it, someday. I didn’t know how. I didn’t know when. When i stopped, in 2006, i knew it wasn’t ended yet. The present i made in 2009, To do’s, was an impossible present in which i tried to get back to work. It failed.
In 2014 i simply started again. Making canvas presents. Writing. Making photos. Like i had never stopped. And then, in January 2015, i got the idea of making an about page.
Then the thought came up: this will be the last present.
I knew it. The moment i thought that, i knew it.
It took me a week to write the about page. The perfect ending. Not that what i wrote was all wisdom, hell no. But it fitted the sketchbook idea. It fitted with me, at that time. I had no idea what i was going to do next.
I didn’t know that in two weeks time i would start a blog. On ellenpronk.com. A domain i had registered years before. For which i had made several designs, none worked out. A domain i used for my work. Several subdomains of work for clients. Now, in two weeks, i had made a design and worked out the theme, started with a Blank WordPress Theme.
I knew i would post five updates a week. I loved making the Beauty posts, Food, Rotterdam. In summer i added a few more categories: My story, Songs. And finally Video Clips.
These clips are special to me. I loved how they came from my walks outside. I loved choosing the music for them.
In 1991 i finished art school. My final work were my selfportraits with the text Feel Me Fuck Me Free Me.
I really had no idea why i had made this. I remember having a halfway exhibition at art school with much more modest photos and texts. Comments from other people got me to try to be bolder and more in your face.
In the years after this i had a small assignment, an exhibition in Breda at Lokaal 01. But it wasn’t working. Not for me. I didn’t know what my work was about, why i made it. I was throwing things in the dark.
So when i found the chance to get a job, at a printer, i took it. One weekend of thinking about this and yes, i went for it. At least i was earning my own keep. And learning things. Living regularly, working with other people. We made a cd for Christmas one year, which was great. All songs written by colleagues. All instruments played by colleagues. Wonderful.
After five years i was done with it. I simply couldn’t continue. I stopped. I gave a great party, the Party of a Millennium. And i started a much more quiet job at a small design firm in Rotterdam.
Nine months after that i went to London. I actually got a job through my website. Which was a dream coming true. Well, i hoped it would be. The company went bust after around 6 months. But it also didn’t go that well. There was hardly any work. I was let go before the others. They extended my trial period. I did worry about that a bit. And yes, after two weeks i had the talk. Bye bye.
I got some small jobs in London. After a year or two i was back at the design company in Rotterdam.
I felt i had failed, to be honest.
I had only stopped making things for a couple of years. In 1997 i started making things for online. I didn’t call it art. I was simply enjoying myself. Flash was my first great discovery. I loved it! April 2000 i made Dream, which generated many visitors and responses.
I’m not sure why i stopped making presents in 2006. I had been going on for nine years. I could have stopped it then. I didn’t. I felt empty. No ideas were coming up. I had this to do list in 2009. Some of these to do’s i haven’t even done now. Five years of silence followed.
So here i am, on 14 April 2016.
This website, this blog, i love. The past year, five days a week, i made a post. I publish each post at 6:00 in the morning. This means i do most of the work the day before. I like it. It gives me a bit of time to think, a bit of time to reread, a bit of time to let it settle down. Not all posts are equally good. Like this week, View is a weak one. But that is fine.
So what do i want?
I could go back to work. It is not that bad. I make enough money that way.
But that is not what i want.
I love the walks. Around Rotterdam, on the beach, through the park. I love the talks with people i do not know. I love the smiles, the saying hello.
Right now my life is bare. A lot of time for myself. A lot of time to waste.
Then, exactly a year ago, i picked a public life. In my life since then nothing much has changed. Well, a few things have. I don’t have my old drawings anymore. That i actually gave them away is a big thing for me.
I still pick a public life. It is not that i want to become famous. That is more a byproduct. I want to meet people, talk with them, look at them, listen to them. I actually would love to travel a bit more. So far that has been low on my wish list. But i would love to see the world, get to know it a bit better. And talk about that here, on ellenpronk.com. As i already do now, but on a smaller scale.
I feel i am getting ready. A bit more. Not that i am perfectly quiet and still and prepared. It is more that i am less afraid. More curious. It is like, i was never that interested in the outside world before. I was just happy doing my own thing. I can still be like that. But i am more aware of what is going on outside. I’m not always right, but i do like to think and look and speak.
So is this art?
Most of the things i make can not be sold. Most of the things i make can not be owned by a single person. Some could be, i guess, but i will not sell them. So i do have to find a way to make a living, to earn money.
11 April 21:01
I’ll be updating this post during the day. I’m writing this the evening before. I will also schedule this post to go public tomorrow morning at 6am. As i do every working day. Nothing new there.
12:00
Mornings are a slow time for me. I did get out of bed around 7:30, gave the cats some food, went to the toilet. After that i went straight back to bed. I did go my rss feeds, but quickly i put aside my iPad and fell asleep. With Mieke, the little black and white cat, sleeping on the bed.
I got out at 9:15. Boiled an egg, cleaned up the catty litter box. Ate my breakfast. I sat behind the computer and went through facebook and twitter. Nothing much is happening. I read again an article from Trouw about psychologist Zimbardo, ‘Iedereen is een held in opleiding’. I do recognize bits of myself in here: how i walk through the city, looking at other people, trying to say hello or goodday as much as possible. Talk to other people as much as i can. A week ago, when i was looking at the archeologists working at the church, a man walked past and looked as well. We started to talk. He was still fit, looked great for his age, 87. He enjoyed talking. Most people do, it’s rare that i talk. But i did meet a man, also last week, who asked me questions. If i had sisters or brothers. How i felt. We shaked hands. He gave me one euro. I laughed. I wasn’t asking, but he still gave it. I remember the man in the supermarket i started talking to. And the little kiss on the cheek i gave him. I was a bit surprised after that, by myself.
I opened up warcraft. I been playing on a private server, the Rebirth. The past week has been hectic. Another private server, a much larger one, Nostalrius, had to close down Sunday 10 April, since they had a cease-and-desist order from Blizzard. The Rebirth only got a small portion of Nostalrius players, but it still means the population has grown around six times over. When i logged into the game this morning, there were around 250 players on alliance side. Usually, on a weekday morning, there are around ten or twenty players online. Global is filled with chat. There are some griefers back too, but on the whole it’s been a blessing to have so many new people in the game. A breath of fresh air.
I did do a Stockade’s run in a level appropriate run. It used to be so hard to find a group of people wanting to do a dungeon run. Now it’s like a field day. Loving it as long as it lasts.
Going to the market soon. Get some food in the house.
14:32
Ooh man, i got money back from my taxes over 2013. I just opened the letters i got from the tax service. I had to look if i had to pay back or receive. Hard to see. Then i checked my bank and wow! i got it back!
17:41
Right now cooking a officially named Saffron and Broad bean paella. No saffron, no dry sherry. But i did add fennel, a bell pepper, a hot pepper and french beans. Enough for two days. I have blanched the broad beans for a minute or so and removed the skins. They are all fresh and green now waiting for the paella to be finished.
I’m already thinking about tomorrow’s post. No idea! Hmmm. Still enough time.
20:24
Tomorrows post is done!
Turns out today was a really average day. Well, apart from the money i got back from the tax office. That made me really happy. Still does. I still need to be careful, but wow, such an unexpected surprise.
Lets just see how it goes tomorrow. I do want to work on a new video clip. Not sure i have enough clips for it. It is a long song i’m using, 7 or 8 minutes. Not sure i will get it done tomorrow.
I also want to write more on my post about my art background. Started weeks ago. I have thought about it, but nothing definite. I know i could write it in the time i have, but not sure this week it’ll be ready in my mind.
I’m gonna watch a bit more tv now. Nothing too exciting. Snowwhite, with Julia Roberts and Lily Collins is on. At 9pm its Bake off: Creme de la Creme. Not sure which one i’ll be watching. I’m going to bed quite early. Like to anyway.
I hope you will enjoy your evening. Where ever you are.
*kiss*
21:27
I started watching the Snowwhite movie. I had already seen it. It’s a bit.. well, i don’t really like it that much. So i switched to the Bake Off series. Also not my favourite. But, it did get me thinking. Of baking something tomorrow. Something sweet. To treat myself. Yay! Nothing too hard, and something that stay good for a while. A cake! So i did a quick search. A New York cheesecake. Hmmm… too much filling. A lemon cake with icing! That sounds good. A carrot cake. Ooh yummy. With the cream cheese frosting. I might pick one from Joy of Baking. Well, i got tomorrow to pick my recipe.
