Author Archives for Ellen

A walk in Rotterdam: the Oude Noorden and Blijdorp

A week ago i walked around the Old North part of Rotterdam, to the Wilgenplantsoen and the Blokland Garden. I also went past the Gandhi Garden, but it was closed at the time. This week i went to the Gandhi Garden again, at a time i knew it was open.

Still no map available, so i will write you through the walk.

I walked over the Noordsingel and the Bergsingel straight to the Gandhi Garden. I spoke with John for a bit, one of the coordinators there. I told him about my walks and writing about them, informally on this website. After this i walked to the center coffee and tea drinking place. A woman was sitting there with her two dogs, Binti and India. We chatted a bit, i drank a coffee. After that i went into the Gandhi Garden and made some photos and talked with some people working there. Some of them i did recognize from my time working there a few years ago. I told them about my walking project and about the Peace Garden, where i work twice a week.

I walked to the end of the garden, where a lovely hexagonal greenhouse was standing. Inside on one side tomatoes were growing. On the other side, and in the middle there were seedlings growing in small pots.

I walked on a small path further to the back, against the wall of the old train rails. In the deep shade woods and other material was sheltered. I smelled some marihuana, but couldn’t find any plants which were looking like it. A small path went all around the gardens. In the middle the beehives were busy standing there.

I walked back to the center place where someone had made more coffee. It was time for a short break. Ronald came too, i know him from the Peace Garden. He told me there was another area with gardens up the Gordelweg. A good next stop! After i finished my coffee i went with him to the big potato hills, wrapped in chicken wire. Time for the harvest!

After that i said my goodbyes to everyone and walked over the Gordelweg on a path besides the canal. Boat houses were lining up there. Really nice to live there. Passing some chickens i saw vegetable gardens on the other side of the fence. Hoping for an entrance further along, i kept on walking past it up until i could turn the corner and i saw an open gate, lucky for me! These Gordelweg gardens were all single user gardens, some neat, some a bit more messy. Areas for compost in between, and a small sheltered area with a bench and a bit of water separated one area from the next. I didn’t see anyone around, but still, it was good to walk there and let the area slowly sink in.

After that i went back home, walking through Blijdorp. I walked through the Central Station and the city centre. At the Schouwburgplein i bought a bara curry chicken which i ate up walking to the market. The vegetable girls were not there though, i asked someone standing besides them, he said their dog had died. So sorry 🙁

So i walked back home. I started to feel a bit tired. Two thirty i was home, four hours after i had left. Time to lay my feet up for a short bit!

A good walk!

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The Gandhi Garden and the Hof van Noord entrance signs
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Grapes around the starting point of the Gandhi garden
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The Gandhi garden
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Flowers and vegetables and herbs
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The greenhouse
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The greenhouse
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A bench on the path around the garden
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Beehives
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The path
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Ronald harvesting the potatoes
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The garden
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The hexagonal greenhouse and the garden - the old train rails behind
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An insect hotel
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Chickens
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The Gordelpad
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Gordelweg gardens
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Rules and regulations of the Gordelweg gardens
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A dried up thistle
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Yellow bellpepper
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Beehives
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Harddraversstraat close to the Central Station
Published on September 7, 2016 at 6:00 by

Photo album

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My mum, my dad, my two sisters playing with me. I am the youngest.
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Pushing my own wagon, sitting besides my dad, on the beach.
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A holiday, somewhere in the Netherlands.
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School pictures, four years and five years old
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On a camel, six years old
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School pictures, fourth or fifth class and sixth class
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The first class of high school (dreadful!)
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A later years, a photo in my room with a friend
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Tenerife photos
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Our cat, Rakker and my mum
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School picture, mum, smoking and stroking Rakker
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Thirtheen, fourteen years old
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Holiday photos
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With my eldest sister, Marja
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Last Tenerife holiday. Below with Jim, the first guy who kissed me, on the beach in the moonlight
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My room upstairs
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Sixteen years old
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Klasseavond, class evening, with Sinterklaas i'm pretty sure
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Tunisia holiday, and Rakker
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An official family photo - my grandparents
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Sitting on the balcony
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A terrible holiday with a friend
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That same terrible holiday
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The evening we stayed in tents at our school, just after we did our exams
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Eightteen years old!
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Photos my sister made of me
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More photos from my sister
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A friend and the photo she made of me
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Around nineteen years old here?
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Whiteblond!
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Studying in Delft, shwoing a study for women studies we made
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Living on my own
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My mum and my dad
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Nikkie and Minnie
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Smooch!
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At artschool, the top photo was a selfportrait
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On the beach with friends
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Working at friends from my mother
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With friends in Zeeland
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Zeeland
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With a friend Saskia in Paris for an art exhibition
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Paris
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Paris
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Short hair!
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Working at the filmfestival Rotterdam
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The final page in this album
Published on September 6, 2016 at 6:00 by

Rain

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The luchtsingel, air bridge and the old Shell building
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Covers for the tomatoes and basil, with raindrops
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A wet table
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Strawberry plants on the side
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The courgette rows, the greenhouse and the water tons
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The compost heap. I asked today if it was possible to put in the wooden catty litter i've been using for the past two weeks. Yes! That will make my garbage bags a lot less full!
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Hop, only a few weeks from harvest time. We will call in a Rotterdam beer brewery to harvest all the hops for their beer.
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The tomatoes, not yet eaten by the rats - grrrr......
Published on September 5, 2016 at 6:00 by

Ellen, Architect of Change

Today i spend some time thinking about privacy. Of which i don’t give myself too much really. I do live alone, so it is my own choice. About some things i’m completely honest. My sex live. My dreams. My sex live used to be on a very low burner for a long time. The past two years it got fired up again. It still is. I’m even talked to on the streets at times. But i don’t go into it. I do feel and think sex is important, but also something i want to share with someone i love.

I mean HUGE TRUE love. Yeah.

So i keep on working hard. Hopefully my work will be recognized soon, will be seen and valued soon. And hopefully one day i will meet someone i will fall in love with. So i think about that in my off hours. Deep at night. In the moonshine. In the starry light.

My dreams are my own. But yes, i have written about them here. Because it also does feel that my dreams are the same as other people’s dreams. Love, happiness, sharing a life, sharing time with other people i enjoy staying with. Simple dreams really.

I’m giving myself time to think about myself, about this world, about my life sofar. To look inside myself. To look outside myself. Television mostly. Television which speeds up and on.

Time to find a good starting point. Which i had already found, of course. But still.

You, reading this, stay well.

Be happy.

Enjoy the day.

The sunshine, the wind, the rain.

Enjoy the night.

The moon. The stars.

<3

Published on September 2, 2016 at 6:00 by

Walk

No one can build you the bridge on which you, and only you, must cross the river of life. There may be countless trails and bridges and demigods who would gladly carry you across; but only at the price of pawning and forgoing yourself. There is one path in the world that none can walk but you. Where does it lead? Don’t ask, walk!

Source: Nietzsche on How to Find Yourself and the True Value of Education

The real value of a real education [has] almost nothing to do with knowledge, and everything to do with simple awareness; awareness of what is so real and essential, so hidden in plain sight all around us, all the time, that we have to keep reminding ourselves over and over:

‘This is water.’

‘This is water.’

It is unimaginably hard to do this, to stay conscious and alive in the adult world day in and day out. Which means yet another grand cliché turns out to be true: your education really IS the job of a lifetime.

Source: This Is Water: David Foster Wallace on Life

Published on September 1, 2016 at 6:00 by

A walk in Rotterdam: the Old North

Today i made a walk through the old north part of Rotterdam. And i did want to make a map of my walk, but the plugin i’m using isn’t working. Grrr. Hopefully with another update the error will be fixed. I did check an old map, which is still working properly. But i do get a fatal error when i go to the make a new map page.

Well, i simply need to talk you through it then.

I started walking past the Rotte to the start of the Zaagmolenstreet. At the Zwaanshals, a good looking square, i made a couple of photos. I turned into the Zwaanshals and walked to the Wilgenplantsoen. This is a small communal garden. The garden where Daniel, who also works at the Peace Garden, works on Tuesdays. I was a bit early. Luckily the garden was open and i walked around and took some photos of the plants and flowers. Quite soon Marion came in, we talked a bit. It turned out she helped setting up the Peace Garden last year. She didn’t have that much free time now though, so she helped at the Wilgenplantsoen now, closest to home.

When Daniel arrived, the children ran up to him and jumped in his arms. That made me smile, lovely to see. I walked with Daniel to the Kinderparadijs, the children’s paradise close by, to get coffee for all of us.

After drinking the coffee, helping some children to get water from the pump in front of the garden and eating some yellow raspberries fresh from the garden, i walked on.

The Bloklandstreet is next. This garden is closed, but it was easy to take a few photos through the fence. I followed the Bloklandstreet to the Bergweg, took a detour through a pet supermarket i had never seen before and walked further past the Willebrordusplein into the Listreet. I crossed the Bergselaan and walked over the Delfgaauwstreet to the Gandhi Garden. I had intended to make some photos there, but it was closed i’m sad to say. Next time i’ll go there on a proper working moment.

I headed to the Bergsingel and walked along it to the Noordsingel. At one point i walked past the street going to the Gare Du Nord, a vegan restaurant. I went up there and made photos of the beds of herbs and vegetables.

After this i headed straight back home and was relieved to lay on the couch for a short while.

Another good walk!

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The Noorderbrug
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The Zwaanshals
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The Zwaanshals
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The Wilgenplantsoen
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The Wilgenplantsoen
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Sunflowers
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The Wilgenplantsoen
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I woke up this cat lying about in the Wilgenplantsoen
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Yellow raspberry
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Not sure what sort of tree this is, a willow maybe? I will ask soon!
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The Kinderparadijs
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The garden in the Bloklandstreet
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The garden in the Bloklandstreet
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Willebrordusplein
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Lisstreet
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Lisplein
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Noordsingel
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Gare Du Nord garden
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Beetles in the Gare Du Nord garden
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Gare Du Nord garden
Published on August 31, 2016 at 6:00 by

Grace

grace

The past week or two i was thinking of throwing the I Ching. I waited. Today it was a good time for me. I had work to do, so i didn’t have plenty of time to work on ellenpronk.com. And the I Ching is something i can simply do at home, not difficult.

I did have a vague question. How do i go further?

This morning i went to the vet with my cat Muis (= Mouse). His diabetes is playing up. His blood was checked, i got insulin for him. Yes, plenty of money, i’m afraid.

I still feel there is something inside me, or outside me, connected to this website, waiting to burst out. But you know, i could be wrong! Easily! I could be sitting here in my house waiting for it to be sold of, me to be homeless and without steady internet. Seeing my life crumble before my eyes. I can see all the people laughing at me, pointing their fingers at me, saying I told you so!

That won’t happen. I’m pretty sure. Almost a 100%. Like 99%.

I don’t know.

I still feel there is something around me. But it is hard to talk about it with friends. Or strangers. Or at all. I gotta keep on going, now is the time, i can not let anything distract me from my true goal.

Goal?

Well, those sort of thoughts.

I do know my thoughts are changing. I’m watching tv a lot more critical, watching the people say their words, do their things. Some of it is terrible. This whole world is filled with people talking their mind with no proper thought. Or so it seems.

Why do i see myself in the center of that world?

It’s not that i have all the answers.

I think.

inbetween

27. I / Corners of the Mouth (Providing Nourishment)

This hexagram is a picture of an open mouth; above and below are firm lines of the lips, and between them the opening. Starting with the mouth, through which we take food for nourishment, the thought leads to nourishment itself. Nourishment of oneself, specifically of the body, is represented in the three lower lines, while the three upper lines represent nourishment and care of others, in a higher, spiritual sense.

THE JUDGMENT

THE CORNERS OF THE MOUTH.
Perseverance brings good fortune.
Pay heed to the providing of nourishment
And to what a man seeks
To fill his own mouth with.

In bestowing care and nourishment, it is important that the right people should be taken care of and that we should attend to our own nourishment in the right way. If we wish to know what anyone is like, we have only to observe on whom he bestows his care and what sides of his own nature he cultivates and nourishes. Nature nourishes all creatures. The great man fosters and takes care of superior men, in order to take care of all men through them. Mencius says about this:

If we wish to know whether anyone is superior or not, we need only observe what part of his being he regards as especially important. The body has superior and inferior, important and unimportant parts. We must not injure important parts for the sake of the unimportant, nor must we injure the superior parts for the sake of the inferior. He who cultivates the inferior parts of his nature is an inferior man. He who cultivates the superior parts of his nature is a superior man.

THE IMAGE

At the foot of the mountain, thunder:
The image of PROVIDING NOURISHMENT.
Thus the superior man is careful of his words
And temperate in eating and drinking.

“God comes forth in the sign of the Arousing”: when in the spring the life forces stir again, all things comes into being anew. “He brings to perfection in the sign of Keeping Still”: thus in the early spring, when the seeds fall to earth, all things are made ready. This is an image of providing nourishment through movement and tranquillity. The superior man takes it as a pattern for the nourishment and cultivation of his character. Words are a movement going form within outward. Eating and drinking are movements from without inward. Both kinds of movement can be modified by tranquillity. For tranquillity keeps the words that come out of the mouth from exceeding proper measure, and keeps the food that goes into the mouth from exceeding its proper measure. Thus character is cultivated.

Six in the third place means:
Turning away from nourishment.
Perseverance brings misfortune.
Do not act thus for ten years.
Nothing serves to further.

He who seeks nourishment that does not nourish reels from desire to gratification and in gratification craves desire. Mad pursuit of pleasure for the satisfaction of the senses never brings one to the goal. One should never (ten years is a complete cycle of time) follow this path, for nothing good can come of it.

22. Pi / Grace

This hexagram shows a fire that breaks out of the secret depths of the earth and, blazing up, illuminates and beautifies the mountain, the heavenly heights. Grace-beauty of form-is necessary in any union if it is to be well ordered and pleasing rather than disordered and chaotic.

THE JUDGMENT

GRACE has success.
In small matters
It is favorable to undertake something.

Grace brings success. However, it is not the essential or fundamental thing; it is only the ornament and therefore be used sparingly and only in little things. In the lower trigram of fire a yielding line comes between two strong lines and makes them beautiful, but the strong lines are the essential content and the weak line is the beautifying form. In the upper trigram of the mountain, the strong line takes the lead, so that here again the strong element must be regarded as the decisive factor. In nature we see in the sky the strong light of the sun; the life of the world depends on it. But this strong, essential thing is changed and given pleasing variety by the moon and the stars. In human affairs, aesthetic form comes into being when traditions exist that, strong and abiding like mountains, are made pleasing by a lucid beauty. By contemplating the forms existing in the heavens we come to understand time and its changing demands. Through contemplation of the forms existing in human society it becomes possible to shape the world.

THE IMAGE

Fire at the foot of the mountain:
The image of GRACE.
Thus does the superior man proceed
When clearing up current affairs.
But he dare not decide controversial issues in this way.

The fire, whose light illuminates the mountain and makes it pleasing, does not shine far; in the same way, beautiful form suffices to brighten and to throw light upon matters of lesser moment, but important questions cannot be decided in this way. They require greater earnestness.

A short thought on these signs and their meaning for me right now. I does remind me of the past ten years, in which i remained silent. I was leading a perfectly ordinary life, working, gaming, watching television shows. But i was standing still.

I d feel different now. I’m moving. Thinking out loud, in this place. I don’t mind that much that this place is not visited by many people. I need this time to clear my head, formulate my thoughts, look around and determine my position. Where do i stand? Where do i start from? What do i want to say?

So for now, these two signs do tell me something valuable.

I need to find a position from where i can sit still and look around. From where i can watch the world hurtle by.

I am almost there.

I think.

Published on August 26, 2016 at 6:00 by