Shared widely is the current understanding of a nation state, a country. It seems that around two hundred years ago this idea of a country came into existence. Before that humans died so much younger, people didn’t travel that far, didn’t speak to someone else over a long distance through a ‘telephone’, didn’t write for a worldwide audience on the internet.
The nation state made possible our current notion of a constitutional state with a social safety net. The residents of these states were given a livelihood and a clear identity. Especially over the last two hundred years lives have changed. But does that make us happy? Does it give us a full-filled life? Does it give us a sense of purpose wide enough?
I have my own sense of impending doom which makes my life difficult at the moment. But i am still not changing my ways. I still have the sense somewhere close in the future lies my salvation. Close yes, within a month or two. I’m burning up every penny i have to find a new way to live, a new cause to fight for, a new story to tell.
We need to work at our earth. We need to right the wrongs we have done here. There is so much work to be done here: make the cities nicer places to live, make the forests wilder, make the plains a better place with loads more wildflowers. Make the grass fields we are so proud of disappear. They are no use to us. These mono cultures are a waste of space. Make the oceans cleaner and stop emptying them of fish and filling them with plastics and pesticides. Make less babies. Stop using all sorts of sugar in our food. Stop it!
This is only a small piece of things we should be working on. Not all the wasteful jobs we have right now. This is what we should fight for.
Get rid of stupid economic neoliberal system. Once and for all!
I live in this world which is already made up: houses which are build a hundred years ago, streets which are made a hundred years ago. I live in this little piece of land, the Netherlands, the Low Countries. In this world, with those mighty big cities: New York, Shanghai, Delhi, Mexico City, Tokyo. With these suburbs, ghettos, slums in them and around them. People fleeing into the cities, trying to find a way to survive this world. This complacent world going ahead on its course not aware of anything that goes wrong. The insects and fish and animals which are becoming extinct each and every day: 150 species each day. Each single day.
And i am sitting here on this piece of the world, the Netherlands. It is icy cold. You need to work work work to get some money money money to live your life life life as good as you can imagine wish dream. People are happy happy happy here, or so they say.
I try to manage my life here. But my money money money is slowly running out. I still live officially in my old house, i get my post there. There still isn’t anyone else living there, strangely enough. But this will not last forever.
I have these scary thoughts and feelings, but i don’t let them take over me. I want a life worth living. Scary thoughts are part of the life i want. It can all go wrong. Of course!
I will make mistakes. Of course. But it is not the end of my life. Not there yet.
There is a rhythm to it. It has grown over time. I still enjoy the pace i set here, five updates a week, five weeks free each year. Or four weeks. It depends on how i feel.
The last few weeks i followed the same pattern: one day a drawing, another day some photos, one day something i write, another day i throw the I Ching or i quote from the Tao Te Ching. And the last week of last year i made a TikTok clip.
I’m still not sure about TikTok. I have only made the one clip, a beginner one. But it is on my mind. Not that i value much of what i have seen on TikTok sofar. But it is still a world to discover for me. I will see what if any will grow out of it.
The thought for this post came halfway during the day. Sunday. This morning the mind was blurry. I wasn’t really thinking about what i would do today for the post. In the afternoon the thought came up. How i work here. Strange how i never thought of that before. But here it is.
I might do another TikTok clip this week. I may write another piece. I enjoyed the one i wrote last week. That one was made in steps. First i thought i would make something really well written, rewrite everything, delete some stuff. But no, it was all in there, but in a small font. Smaller as it got older.
So i got several easy ones like the I Ching, some which require some work, but are not difficult, like making photographs, some which require inspiration, like making drawings. And then some which came back to me, filming. This time short films. And then of course writing something. It could be a memory, or something i came across during the day, or something i am thinking about.