Author Archives for Ellen

Questions questions

  • Do you have a dream to follow?
  • What are we, as human beings, going to do with our moment in time?
  • What is more important to you in your relationships: love or respect?
  • What path through life appeals to you the most?
  • Bruce Lee: “you will never get any more out of life than you expect”. Do you agree with him?
  • James Baldwin: “you’ve got to tell the world how to treat you because if the world tells you how you are going to be treated, you are in trouble”. Do you agree with him?
  • Are you able to face up to loneliness in your life?
Published on June 17, 2022 at 6:00 by

Spinner

Today i went back to the house i stayed in a couple of months back. This time together with Spinner, the cat!
He does need to get used to me a bit.
He is a sweety pie!
With beautiul green eyes 🙂
Published on June 16, 2022 at 6:00 by

Looking and thinking

Yesterday i worked in the Peace Garden and talked with the intern about many things: her education, her future plans, my ideas on abortion and sex. Back home i came across this article Hoe het economisch model ons ziek maakt 1 (How the economic model makes us sick). An unhealthy lifestyle costs the Belgian welfare tens of billions of euros each year.

  • air pollution: 17 billion euro
  • problematic alcohol consumption: 9 billion euro
  • tabacco: 13 billion euro

(Figures are for Belgium.)

A week ago in the Netherlands the government came with the plan to reduce livestock numbers, a short explanation you can read in The Netherlands’ Farm Crisis, Explained 2. Dutch animal farming is among the most intensive in the world. A 100 million chickens, 11.4 million pigs and 3.8 million cows. The highest livestock density in the world. We do need to take care of this and lessen the amount of animals living in this small country.

These are only two examples how the current industry and agriculture spoil our living world. Two amongst many.

My main focus is not to thoroughly investigate how all these global industries work. I want to ask questions. As many as i can. Not give any answers.


1. Hoe het economisch model ons ziek maaktSamenleving & Politiek

2. The Netherlands’ Farm Crisis, Explained

Published on June 14, 2022 at 6:00 by

Myself in this world

The past eight years have been eventful for me. I sold my house. I lived of the money i got from that. Now i’m nearing the end of my money.

I don’t know why i stay as calm as i do. Sometimes i do get nervous, anxious, scared. Mostly not. I should be so much more worried. Trying to find a job, to make some money to tie myself over. Make my life work.

This is not about me proving myself. This is not about me winning in any way. There is nothing to win, nothing to loose. But it is about me being truthful to myself, with all my heart. Doing the things i love to do, with all my heart.

Source: My future

I have spend my life to work on this website. With very little to show for it to be truthful. I want to be truthful to myself. This is so difficult. What does my heart want? A boyfriend? Is that it? True love? Someone to spend my life with, with all its difficulties and miscommunications? Someone to utterly love, despite all the hassles and confusions that will exist between us?

I don’t know anymore where and when i may find this person. I never knew anyway. I can only live my life as good as i can. Even if i completely fail at it.

Completely fail.

Published on June 7, 2022 at 6:00 by

There need to be people


Er moeten mensen zijn
die zonnen aansteken,
voordat de wereld verregent.

Mensen die zomervliegers oplaten
als het ijzig wintert,
en die confetti strooien
tussen de sneeuwvlokken.

Die mensen moeten er zijn.

Er moeten mensen zijn
die aan de uitgang van het kerkhof
ijsjes verkopen,
en op de puinhopen
mondharmonica spelen.

Er moeten mensen zijn,
die op hun stoelen gaan staan,
om sterren op te hangen
in de mist.
Die lente maken
van gevallen bladeren,
en van gevallen schaduw,
licht.

Er moeten mensen zijn,
die ons verwarmen
en die in een wolkeloze hemel
toch in de wolken zijn
zo hoog
ze springen touwtje
langs de regenboog
als iemand heeft gezegd:
kom maar in mijn armen

Bij dat soort mensen wil ik horen
Die op het tuinfeest in de regen BLIJVEN dansen
ook als de muzikanten al naar huis zijn gegaan

Er moeten mensen zijn
die op het grijze asfalt
in grote witte letters
LIEFDE verven
Mensen die namen kerven
in een boom
vol rijpe vruchten
omdat er zoveel anderen zijn
die voor de vlinders vluchten
en stenen gooien
naar het eerste lenteblauw
omdat ze bang zijn
voor de bloemen
en bang zijn voor:
ik hou van jou

Ja,
er moeten mensen zijn
met tranen
als zilveren kralen
die stralen in het donker
en de morgen groeten
als het daglicht binnenkomt
op kousenvoeten

Weet je,
er moeten mensen zijn,
die bellen blazen
en weten van geen tijd
die zich kinderlijk verbazen
over iets wat barst
van mooiigheid
Ze roepen van de daken
dat er liefde is
en wonder
als al die anderen schreeuwen:
alles heeft geen zin
dan blijven zij roepen:
neen, de wereld gaat niet onder
en zij zien in ieder einde
weer een nieuw begin
Zij zijn een beetje clown,
eerst het hart
en dan het verstand
en ze schrijven met hun paraplu
i love you in het zand
omdat ze zo gigantisch
in het leven opgaan
en vallen
en vallen
en vallen
en OPSTAAN

Bij dát soort mensen wil ik horen
die op het tuinfeest in de regen BLIJVEN dansen
ook als de muzikanten al naar huis zijn gegaan
de muziek gaat DOOR
de muziek gaat DOOR
en DOOR

Toon Hermans

there need to be people

There need to be people
that light suns,
before the world rains out.

People who let up summer kites
when it’s freezing winter,
and throw confetti
between the snowflakes.

Those people need to be there.

There need to be people
who stand at the exit of the cemetery
selling icecream,
and on the dumps
play harmonica.

There need to be people,
who stand on their chairs,
to catch the stars
in the mist.

Who make spring
of fallen leaves,
en of fallen shadow,
light.

There must be people,
who warm us
and who in a cloudless sky
are in the clouds
so high
they jump rope
along the rainbow
when someone has said:
come in my arms

Those are the people that I want to belong with

Who KEEP dancing at the garden party
even after all the musicians have gone home

There need to be people
who on the grey asphalt
in great big letters
paint LOVE

People who carve names
into a tree
full of ripe fruit
because there are so many others
who run from butterflies
and throw stones
at the first spring blue
because they are afraid of:
I love you

Yes,
There need to be people
with tears
as silver beads
who are rays in the dark
and welcoming morning
as the daylight comes
on dragging feet

You know,
there need to be people,
who blow bubbles
and have no concept of time
who can have childish wonder
about something that cracks
of beauty

They scream across the rooftops
that there is love
and wonder
when all those others are screaming:
no, the world is ending
and they see in every ending
a new beginning already

They’re a bit of a clown,
heart first
then mind
and they write with their umbrellas
I love you in the sand
because they are so enormously
absorbed in life

and fall
and fall
and fall

and RISE

These are the kind of people I want to belong with
Who KEEP dancing at the garden party
Even after the musicians have gone home

the music goes ON

the music goes ON

and ON

Published on June 6, 2022 at 6:00 by